Welcome back to Passive Pokémon Perks 101, Abiliteers! We’ve got a pretty fun and reasonably versatile Ability to discuss this week, so strap in and hold tight to any valuables. Or, you know, don’t. This week we’re discovering that sometimes lightening the load is exactly what you need to pave a road to victory! This is Ability of the Week: Unburden!
Here we go again, kids. It’s high time I got through another trio of Abilities for your weekly pokémon edutainment.
…A brief pause here to acknowledge the hilarious fact that Microsoft Word has not attempted to correct the word “edutainment”. The sheer number of made-up words I’ve invented for this article, and I can get away with “edutainment” scot-free. I suppose I have PBS to thank for this. Thanks, Fred Rogers, you’re missed.
Anyhoo. Let’s get this thing started. Put on your Abiliteer caps, boys and girls! This is Ability of the Week: Rapid-Fire!! Poison Touch, Forewarn, and Keen Eye!
Let’s touch briefly on a topic that can seem foreign to many of us that frequent this site and are fans of the noble work of the Pokémon Podcast: love and romance. WAIT WAIT WAIT, KEEP READING. KENNY, STOP SCROLLING. KAY, YOU TOO. GET. NO. GUYS. COME BACK HERE. Ugh. The rest of you still here? Good. Let’s face it, gentlemen, we’re some-teens and twenty-somethings who wax sentimental and intellectual about a video game and trading card game franchise that’s aimed primarily at tweens and children. I’m no Dr. Love, but I imagine that most of the fairer sex doesn’t find this an overtly attractive trait, but that’s also why we find ourselves so enamored with the few of you ladies out there that join in with as much (or more) fervor as we do in our monster-wrangling pastime. That is, when we’re paying attention. Fellas, if you’re like me, you’re horrible at reading signals from the ladies. Comes with the nerd territory, you know? But hey, they say to make your weaknesses into strengths, right? And we can, at least, with our pokémon. This is Ability of the Week: Oblivious!
Hello there, welcome to Abiliteers Annoymous. I’m Wil, and I’m an Abiliteer. “Hiiii, Wiiiil”. I thought I had kicked using pokémon Abilities, but the sheer usefulness of having a passive perk that compliments my pixilated cockfighter is just too great to pass up. Some people though, rely on silly things like moves and items to win matches. Maybe they like to build defense up with Iron Defense, or give their pokémon fancy pants scarves or some silliness to power up their attacks. The most obnoxious of these, dear friends, that you may run across are people who delight in simply diminishing the odds for your digital soldiers of pokéfortune. These are the people that give their Steelix Screech, or their Blastoise Toxic, perhaps their Ferrothorn Spikes, or any of the hundreds of pokémon that can learn it, the dreaded Sand Attack. These trainers are the most persistent kind of annoying, and the fun of the game for them is taking your fun away from you. But fear not, friends. We can defeat them. We have the technology. We have Ability of the Week: Magic Bounce!
Oh column. Sometimes you’re too good to me. So good that it actually makes things a little harder. Here I am, picking Abilities almost arbitrarily on a weekly basis, and then having to figure out a somewhat clever lead-in to the article. Maybe a play on words? A what-if scenario? How about a pop-culture reference? And then fate just decides to go a throw me an Ability with a name so obvious to its effect, there’s really nothing I can say except complain that all I can say is this is Ability of the Week: Stall!
Hey guys! Long time! Before we get into it, I owe you guys an explanation for my unscheduled hiatus. The simplest explanation is just three words: “I’ve been busy”. As those of you keeping score at home know, I moved out of my parents house around November last year, and since then, I’ve been largely preoccupied with converting my suburban Chicago apartment into a home (which largely entails cleaning up after company and roommates, but I digress). I’ve also taken up a new day job that, apart from occupying about 30 hours of my week and my entire weekend, leaves me utterly exhausted, which makes finishing off a Friday article difficult. The Redeemers team and I over at Lonely Robot Comics have also been working nonstop on getting issue three out the door in time for C2E2, which I’m proud to say we have accomplished. Finally, apart from my comic book, I’ve had a few other art gigs (including the new PKMNcast convention banner) that have been commanding all of my free time. So that brings us up to present day. I’ve still got a lot on my plate, but I’ve whittled it back to a manageable amount. Also, in an attempt to get my article out on a regular basis again, I’m going to try moving the regular AOTW day to Thursday, so the next article will be out later this week.
But enough about my scheduling conflicts! Let’s talk some pokémon! In Pokémon Ruby and Sapphire Versions, a family of monsters was introduced with a focus on sound. This trifecta of tonality appeared on the Hoenn scene and brought with them a one-of-a-kind Ability that renders the user impervious to all attacks of their own specialty! It’s time to get your earplugs ready, because this is Ability of the Week: Cacophony!