Rare Article: 3 Things in Pokémon You Probably Misunderstand

The inspiration for this article, which will be about misunderstandings in the Pokémon world, comes my misunderstanding of one of the comments on my last post. Now isn't that funny? I know. It's not that funny, but you don't need to be so hard on me. 

This will be an exploration of concepts in the Pokémon videogames that are often misunderstood, just like that kid who always sat alone in the middle school lunch room (read: all of us.) Get ready to have your mind blown like that Psyduck on your right.

Chapter 1: Brine, Or: I Contend that "Brine" is Almost as Disgusting of a Word as "Moist."

Section 1: What You Think it Does

You think that this move, Brine, doubles in strength when you have less than 50% of your health. Because you erroneously think this, you go around saying to all of your Poképals that you are going to "totes run Brine on a Poke with a focus sash then get my brine up in here when I have 1 hp for like tons of damaaaaaaageeeeebraaaaah!" because you talk like that. You are incorrect. (If it makes you feel any better, I thought the same thing.) Here's why you are (and at one point I was) wrong...

Section 2: What It Actually Does

Brine actually doubles in strength when the target, i.e. your opponent's Pokémon, has below 50% of its health. That means that Brine will only really be worthwhile when your opponent is already almost taken out. This is unfortunate, because chances are that if you have your opponent down to less than half of their health, you probably don't need that damage doubling. Sadface. 

Chapter 2: Trick Room, Or: If I Were not a Pokémon Fanatic, I Would Think that "Trick Room" Was Some Sort of Magician Superstore

Section 1: What You Think it Does

You think that Trick Room changes speed stats so that slower Pokémon become faster and faster Pokémon become slower. Because of this, you want to run Electroball on a Magnezone, because it's measly 60 base speed will jump because of Trick Room, and since Electroball gets stronger when you are faster than your opponent, you'll do some insane damage!

Section 2: What it Actually Does

Trick Room does not alter speed stats. It just makes slower Pokémon attack first. In other words, your Magnezone is still slower than its opponent, it just attacks first because of Trick Room.

Chapter 3: Lagging Tail, Or: I'm Pretty Sure that They Murder Onyx to Get These Things. #OccupyPewterCity

Section 1: What You Think it Does

I'll make this one short. You think that it lowers your speed so that Gyro Ball becomes your best friend.

Section 2: What it Actually Does

I'll make this one almost as short. It doesn't do that. It just makes you attack last, doing nothing to your speed stat, so Gyro Ball doesn't become your best friend. Stupid Gyro Ball. It should be more friendly.


I'm just kidding. I don't think you talk like I mentioned you did earlier. I don't think you're dumb. You are all beautiful and brilliant people. Catchya next week.